A sample from Chumpty Dumpty!
Chumpty Dumpty chapter one is in the books. Here’s a snippet from the text, taken from the second half of the chapter. It introduces us to Chumpty’s friends who will (spoiler alert) accompany him on his adventure…
The playground at Mother Goose’s Second Generation Academy was always a happy, boisterous place to be. The sons and daughters of many of the Kingdom’s most famous residents attended here, being taught by the most famous historian in the history of the land, Mrs. Goose herself.
Bouncing balls sailed through the air, kids on swings kicked the sky as they strained to reach just a little higher, girls hung from monkey bars and boys balanced on fence posts while their friends tossed pebbles at their faces.
Everyone loved recess. Everyone not named Chumpty, that is.
*WHACK*
An orange bouncing ball sailed right into the path of the unobservant Dumpty. It struck the top of his egg head and flung him forward, knocking his red, wire-framed glasses slightly off kilter.
“Oh I’m sorry, your Majesty.” Jack Horner, Jr. called from behind. Chumpty turned to see the smug-faced boy approaching, baseball cap slightly askew on his head. If you didn’t know him, you’d think he had a run-in with a bully that knocked his hat loose. If you did know him, you’d know that he never had run-ins with a bully.
He was the bully.
“Great…” Chumpty said, spotting the two cronies that always shadowed Horner. To his left was Roofus. Just Roofus. He had to be the child of someone from Goose’s history, but no one knew who. He was large, though, thick in body as much as he was think in the head.
To Horner’s right was Timmy Tucker, a scrawny, mouse-faced kid who always sneered and never talked. They did the dirty work; Tucker caught the runners and Roofus pummeled them. Little Jack Horner Jr. never did anything more than just stand there making threats.
“Does the little Prince want his ball back?” Horner called, bowing to Chumpty with a mocking wave of his hand.
“It’s not my ball.”
Roofus stepped forward, clutching the orange orb. “Then you won’t mind if I do this!” he said, squeezing the ball till it POPPEPD.
“No…” Chumpty replied, mildly confused by the attempt to upset him. “Like I said, it’s not my ball.”
Horner rolled his eyes and pulled his thick-headed partner back. “Your little friends aren’t here to save you, Chump. Where are they? Finally ditch you?”
“No. They aren’t out of class yet.” Chumpty replied, wishing he hadn’t. He knew better than to try and talk his way out of Horner’s tauntings.
“Who are they again?” he asked Timmy, who did not respond. “The friends of the egg? Let’s see, there’s the cow, there’s the shepherd girl; oh wait, that’s the same one!”
Chumpty took a step forward, shaking with anger, ready to fight, hopeless though it would have been. The trio before him let out a collective “ooh,” clearly not intimidated. The action that was surely about to follow was interrupted, however…
“Hey! My ball!” Sally Blue shouted as she ran toward them, scooping up the busted ball and running for the nearest teacher. Horner and his posse hurried away, leaving their would-be victim standing alone.
“Chumpty!” a voice from his right yelled. He turned to see his friend Art, hurrying toward them. For a cow, he was surprisingly fast, clearing half the playground in just a few seconds.
Unfortunately, his peripheral vision was not the best. He failed to spot the rustling in the bushes near Chumpty, and he missed Will the horse leaping out of those bushes, sporting a full suit and tie, with an earpiece dangling from the sides of his sunglasses.
“Hold it right there!” the horse shouted, ninja-kicking onto the scene, putting his body in between the egg and the cow.
“Ahh!” Art bellowed, eyes bugging out at the sight of the horse. He skidded to a halt and fell backward.
“State your name!” Will demanded, holding his hands out as if ready for a Karate Tournament.
“Whoa whoa stop no no!” Chumpty called out, waving his arms as he tried to put his body between the horse and the cow. “Stop, he’s my friend!” Will’s eyes darted from Art and Chumpty, then back to Art, then back to Chumpty.
This went on for a good ten seconds.
Finally, it clicked, and a sheepish smile crept across Will’s face and his Karate hands went limp as he straightened back to attention. “Sorry your highness. It looked like he was attacking, and my training kicked in.” He rubbed the back of his head, fumbling to find the right words while Chumpty’s face turned into a bigger and bigger scowl. “Well, you know, charging bull and all. I couldn’t let you be trampled on my third day—”
“I don’t need any help!” Chumpty barked at him. “I can take care of myself. I already told my d—wait, did you say third day?”
“Uh…did I? That doesn’t sound like me. No. I mean, neigh?”
“I told my dad two days ago I didn’t want any bodyguards at school.”
“You also told him about getting picked on…” Will replied before turning to the bushes and holding a hoof up to his ear. “All clear. False alarm.
“This doesn’t help, I promise.”
Will didn’t hear as he was continuing his conversation what looked like no one in the bush next to them. “Cow was not a threat. Repeat: Dairy not Bull.”
“Hey!” Art balked. “I am not a dairy cow.”
“Very good your majesty, I’ll remain on guard.”
“…thanks.” Chumpty replied with a sigh.
Will nodded and turned to leave…back to the tiny bush he was just talking to, one would think, but then spotted a sweet young shepherd girl happily approaching.
“Hey guys!” Betty said, skipping as she neared, her shepherd’s cane resting on her shoulder.
“She’s got a weapon!” Will shouted, rearing back to lunge for Betty.
“NO!” Chumpty just managed to get a hold of his belt, and stopped him from pouncing. “She’s with us!”
Will straightened and tried to play it cool, nodding at Betty as she walked by. As she joined Art and Chumpty, Will’s hoof slyly went back to his ear. “False alarm.” he muttered and leapt out of sight.
“Is he…?” Betty began to ask.
Chumpty sighed. “He’s new.”
The character of Jack Horner Jr. is intended to show the reader that Chumpty is often the target of bullying but, in one brief little moment, has the internal desire to stand up for himself buried under that shell of his. A lot (over 90%) of the dialogue here is lifted right out of the screenplay, and this was very much a Phillip section. The moment where Chumpty stands up for Betty when Jack Horner attacks her was Phil’s all the way.
When we wrote this, we divided the story up into scenes and then split the scenes between the two of us. We then wrote for an hour or so before swapping to make notes and changes to each other’s work, adding a line here, changing a phrase there. After that we swapped back, looked at the changes, made changes to the changes, and back and forth it went until we were satisfied.
The end result was something, not 50-50 me and him, but 100-100 me and him. Nevertheless, as I go over the screenplay while writing the book, I can vividly remember which scenes were his and which were mine. The first half of this chapter (not featured in this sample) was mine. This was his, though I added the character of Will and his dialogue.
I was afraid that writing this would bring up a lot of sadness. Instead it’s been just the opposite.